Tuesday, August 14, 2012


THE KISSING CONTROVERSY

We live in times where things have really changed from what it used to be. In times past things were either black or white but like a friend on facebook pointed out, there is also grey.

One matter that you’ll find in that grey area is the issue of kissing.

Is kissing for non-married couples a sin?

I tried to carry out a survey on this and got varying opinions from over 30 people both single and married and based on those opinions and my own personal convictions, the ideas on this piece was put together.

Truth is, I’m yet to come across any married couple today that didn’t share a kiss before marriage (wish I could add a smiley after that) but that’s the truth. A kiss is a kiss like one respondent said, whether on the back of the hand, cheek, fore head, nose, lips, a kiss is a kiss. Makes me wonder, at what point does the sin part come in? Scripture says in Jer 17:10a “I the Lord I search the hearth”, that is to say that God looks at the intent of the heart.

I pause here because I know we are dealing on a very delicate matter here, a matter of which many would rather avoid.

Jesus in addressing the Jews in Matt 5:28 said “But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.” Now if we compare this to what God said in Jer 17:10, we see clearly that God is not as interested in the act as He is in the state of the heart.

Some of the respondents made mention of self control and crossing the line and knowing when to stop but I ask; What is the state of the heart? Ultimately, sex is the sin No, the “lusting after” in the place of the mind is the sin and all clergy tries to do when they put up those Dos and Don’ts which we young people greatly abhor is to try and prevent us from falling into sin. The devil is quite crafty and easily can help us come up with a million sound arguments that are on point but be not deceived, God is not mocked.

Its either Black or White no grey. Grey is lukewarm (neither here nor there) and scripture says that lukewarm will be spilt out. So if you can assure God not man of the state of your heart before and after kissing, then kiss on oh ye unmarried folks, but if you can’t, I’ll advice you stay away and adhere to the voice of reason that says “Flee fleshly lusts”.

Remain rapturable by His Grace.

Selah!!! 

5 comments:

  1. Hmm. There was a time that a kiss between two people was a greeting. Now, even a kiss between two girls can be viewed as troublesome.
    The state of the heart.
    Sigh.
    Thank God for grace. #ThatIsAll.

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  2. My thoughts on the above subject matter are clearly spelt out in Romans14:1-23, particularly verses 5, 14 and 22-23. There is really no hard and fast rule to it.There are two schools of thought and both of them are correct in a sense. The first school of thought says dont do anything that can lead you into sin or dont start something you may not be able to control because of the weakness of the flesh. Ist Corinthians 6:9 acknowledges that there are some who dont have self control. In such cases, we are enjoined to flee any appearance of evil and make no provision for the flesh. On the otherhand, the second school of those believes that to the pure, all things are pure Titus 1:15 which comes back to what Obinna was talking about the heart. Kissing, just like, huggung, holding hands, etc are all show of affection to the special person you love and hope to share your life with. However I believe that clear lines must be drawn in such cases and God must continue to be the Lord of that relationship. You must desist once you believe that you are going to far and set further bounderies. Finally and most importantly, we have the Holy Spirit who leads us and warns us in everything even in things like kissing. What has he said to you as a person? What is your conscience saying? Please read Romans 14:1-23 before answering that question. Bless you

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